Here’s a question for you: I think Vox Day can be over the top cruel sometimes, and I think his racial theories are, generally, bunk.
I think John C. Wright can tend towards elitism (though in his case I do think he’s working on it, but still).
I even think that Zippy sometimes gets a bit too obtuse in his jargon (sorry, Zippy – I still heart you).
So why do I read and have a lot of respect for all of these people and pretty much none for folks like John Scalzi, Jim Hines, and all feminists ever?
Because they value HONESTY.
The “Sheila” incident is an excellent example. For my newer followers, Sheila was a commenter from the blog lotharlorraine. She was passive-aggressive and believed some vile things that she tried to spin as being reasonable (Abortion is murder and also should be legal! Mothers have almost no responsibility when it comes to abortions, and if you think otherwise it means you don’t care about raped or suicidal women! I am a Catholic, but have little to no respect for my Church’s actual teachings! If you don’t support mandatory government funded contraception you don’t care about single mothers!), and whenever I called her out on it she would passive-aggressively accuse of me of being an awful women-hating misogynist.
The thing is, Sheila was nice. Sure, she accused me of being a terrible person, but very nicely, with few exclamation points, and when I called her bullshit bullshit she pointed out I was mean and pouted. This got her points from Marc (the blogmaster) who accused me of not being nice enough and thus hurting my cause.
And then there was Ross, who claimed I was the equivalent of Torquemada and he was Jesus because I was mean, except he originally did it behind my back then whined when I forced him to confront me.
Perhaps this is the biggest difference between SJW’s and conservatives: I, and Wright, and Vox, and Zippy, have zero respect for lying liars who lie all the time. We all might be mean, but we’re honest. And anybody who is honest about what they believe and why they believe it, and speaks of their opponents honestly and to their faces, will always have my respect no matter how much I may disagree with them otherwise.